Father's Day 2013

My Dear Rishi,

Hope you are doing well. It has been more than a month since we have talked, I called many times and there has been no answer.

May 12th, 2013-Singapore

It has been six years since we have celebrated father's day together. This is the first year I did not even get to talk to you. Rishi, God bless you son wherever you are,  may you always be happy, healthy,  have lots of fun, be safe,  let there be always abundance of love in your life.

Rishi, I played your message the one you recorded  for me when I was in Singapore countless number times today Thank you my love for your heartfelt message.   Here is your message:

Rishi, sometimes you may find life too confusing, complicated and frustrating. Things may not make sense or don't fall in place, people around you may appear to be mean and cruel, self-centered and selfish.  Sometimes you feel like screaming at the world and saying "WHY ME"? At least that's how I felt like today when I could not speak to you. I sat down took a deep breath and meditated for few minutes to calm myself down.

There was a sudden clarity and I received following message love:

1. Look back and Thank God.
2. Look forward and Trust God.
3. Look around and Believe in God
4. Look within yourself and find God

Rishi this is my message for you for Father's Day.  I love you all the way from here to the moon and back. I miss you.

With lots of love, hugs and kisses.
.
Daddy
 

Just a Little Smile

My Dear Rishi,

This journey of writing of this blog started on May 24th, 2011 and I can't believe, it has been two years. Hopefully, some day you come across this blog and read these letters. Hope, you may find some answers in these letters  and hopefully give you a glimpse about your father apart from what you have been told.

You may at times wonder why I talk about compassion, love and forgiveness. You may ponder, "if these values have any place in this word"? Especially, when there are some elements in our society who will take advantage of these qualities.  I have learned end of the day one has to live with oneself irrespective with what we do. My mom used to say all you have is control over your actions and no one else.If our actions are from a place of love, compassion and forgiveness, you will sleep peacefully. Over the years I have learned that , "Life is nothing but 10% of what has happens to us and rest 90% is how we react to it?"  Lastly, I came across a brilliant quote, earlier this week which very eloquently captured what I wanted to say to you in this letter.  Here is the quote by, L.R. Knost:

"It's not our job to toughen our children up to face a cruel and heartless world.

It's our job to raise children who will make the world a little less cruel and heartless."

 

 My only, hope, wish and prayer for you and your generation is that you all together have made this world a little less cruel and heartless Rishi. Your name also means "Ray of First Light", my prayers, hope and wish is that you can be that beacon of light.

 

 

Today''s story is called,

 

 " Just a Little Smile"

Author: Unknown

 

 

Mark was walking home from school one day when he noticed the boy ahead of him had tripped and dropped all of the books he was carrying, along with two sweaters, a baseball bat, a glove and a small tape recorder.  Mark knelt down and helped the boy pick up the scattered articles. Since they were going the same way, he helped to carry part of the burden. As they walked Mark discovered the boy's name was Bill, that he loved video games, baseball and history, and that he was having lots of trouble with his other subjects and that he had just broken up with his girlfriend

.

They arrived at Bill's home first and Mark was invited in for a Coke and to watch some television. The afternoon passed pleasantly with a few laughs and shared small talk, then Mark went home. They continued to see each other around school, had lunch together once or twice, then both graduated from junior high school. They ended up in same high school where they had brief contacts over the years. Finally, the long awaited senior year came and then the graduation week.   Bill was the class valedictorian and he was asked to give a speech on the graduation day.

  

Bill confidently, walked to the podium and started his speech by thanking Mark. He paused and asked,  "Mark, do you remember the day years ago when we met for the first time while walking home? Did you ever wonder why I was carrying so many things home that day?" Bill, went on, " You see, Mark, " I cleaned out my locker because I didn't want to leave a mess for anyone else. I had stored away some of my mother's sleeping pills and I was going home to commit suicide. But after we spent some time together talking and laughing, I realized that if I had killed myself, I would have missed that time and so many others that might follow. So you see, Mark when you picked up those books that day, you did a lot more. You saved my life! Thank you my friend. There was a standing applause as Bill finished his speech.

 

Rishi, Mark's compassion saved Bill's life and  in turn Mark found a good friend for life.  Everyone in this world is at some level or other are struggling through life. Sometimes all it takes is, "just a little smile,compassion and kindness" you can not only  transform some one's world but also your own life.

 

I hope, pray and wish you are blessed with a compassionate and kind heart, love.  God Bless you Son!

 

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

 

Daddy

 

P.S: I love you all the way from here to the moon and back times two, love.  Miss you!.

 



A Wise Woman's Stone

My Dear Rishi,

I was looking forward to speaking to you last weekend and I could not reach you.

This week's story is a very interesting story, which I found very appropriate for developing a compassionate heart. Hope you see the beauty in the story.

 

The Wise Woman's Stone

Author Unknown

 

A wise woman who was travelling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream. The next day she met another traveler who was hungry, and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him. She did so without hesitation. The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune. He knew the stone was worth enough to give him security for a lifetime. But a few days later he came back to return the stone to the wise woman.

 

"I 've been thinking" he said "I know how valuable the stone is, but I give it back in the hope that you can give me something even more precious. Give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me something more precious. Give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me the stone.

 

Rishi, the only the thing I can think of is that this woman's compassionate heart is the most precious which enabled her to part with the precious stone.  Developing a compassionate heart is more important than any riches in the world.

 

Hope, I can speak to you before you go for your holiday's.

 

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

 

Daddy

 



Mother's Day: A Tribute to Mother- Light of my Life

My Dear Rishi,

It was fun spending time with you from Friday evening till Saturday 1pm. Will post some of pictures next week. 

I came across an interesting story for Mother's Day and I wanted to share this with you while also taking this opportunity to pay to tribute to my mother and your grand mother who passed away on April 18th.

Wise words from a Child about a Mother

Anonymous

Teacher Debbie Moon's first graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had a different hair color than the other members. One of her students suggested that he was adopted. A little girl said, 'I know all about adoption, I was adopted..'

'What does it mean to be adopted?’ asked another child.

'It means', said the girl, 'that you grew in your mommy's heart instead of her tummy!'


Rishi, I am so grateful to have a had the opportunity of being raised by a wonderful mother who taught me by her own actions what is unconditional love. There are no words to describe how grateful I am to my mother who not only helped me when I was a child but has been foundation, roof and light of my life. All her sisters, my uncle (her brother) and her parents (my grandparents) equally love me. I might have done something very good in my past life to be have been blessed by such a wonderful mother and  at times I feel I was raised by a goddess (my mom) and surrounded by angels (my mom's sisters, brother and her parents).

She was always there for me.  When I was about 10 years old I was very ill, she stayed up all night taking care of me and did not leave my side for more than thirty minutes. After finishing my high school and ready to go to University she was there for me encouraging me and always saying never ever to give up. Her famous quote was, " Do your work and rest live it to God. Your duty is to study, work hard and results are not up to you. You only have the right to work hard and do your part. That's all!".. When I finished my undergraduate, I got an opportunity to study abroad and I hardly had any time. My dad was away from town, so she made the decision I should go ahead and study. She encouraged me and morally supported me. It was very difficult to leave my mother and go abroad. Mom's encouragement, love and support helped me to take that leap into an unknown world. She said to me, " I have faith in you, my upbringing and god. Go spread your wings, world is yours". It might have been very difficult for  mom to send me away but she always put my welfare and future in mind. Today, whatever good qualities I have in me it is all because of her. All my educational qualifications are once again because of her. She was always there, when ever I called, she would answer the phone. Recently, despite her illness she would at least say hello and always end the call by saying, "Good Luck! God bless you". Now when I call home I will not hear mom's voice.

Mom was always kind to everyone who ever came across her path. She was kind, compassionate, loving and very generous lady. She walked the talk, "Compassion in thought, word and deed". There was never a time I heard her say a mean or harsh word to anyone. She always taught me the power of forgiveness and to learn to speak the language of kindness and love.

You may be wondering why I am waxing lyrics of my mother so much, after all every mother puts her children's interest ahead of her own. Well Rishi, " I grew in my mom's heart rather than her tummy". Hence my gratitude towards her. I will miss her! Light of my life is gone but the light she lit in my heart and so many peoples hearts will continue to glow. Like an angle she will always be in my heart and her love will always be felt. I do miss her sitting alone in Singapore with no one to talk to but I feel my mother's love as I type this letter to you.

Happy Mother's Day. I am grateful and blessed to have been raised by such a wonderful human being. I am indeed blessed! Thank you God!

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy

He Rescues the Birds

My Dear Rishi,

I can't wait to see you and spend time this weekend love.

Recently, I came across one of my favourite leader and a Statesman, Abraham Lincoln's story which I had never heard or read before. Before I get into the actual story let me take this opportunity to say few words about this great man.

Abraham Lincoln was the 16th president of the United States of America. He was the president from 1861 to 1865. He abolished slavery, led the country during one of the most tumultuous period in the US history i.e. during the civil war and finally united the country.  Hope one day you can read more about him and learn, love.

Now getting back to the story.

 He Rescues the Birds

 By Charles W. Moores.

Once, while riding through the country with some other lawyers, Abraham Lincoln was missed from the party, and was seen loitering near a thicket of wild plum trees where the men had stopped short time before to water the horses.

"Where is Lincoln?" asked one of the lawyers.

"When I saw him last, " answered another," had caught two young birds that the wind had blown out of their nest, and was hunting for the nest to put them back again".

As Lincoln joined them, the lawyers rallied him on his tender-heartedness, and he said:-

" I could not have slept unless I had restored those little birds to their mother".


Rishi, Abraham Lincoln's small acts of random kindness and compassion ultimately led him to abolishing slavery in the United States. I believe abolishing slavery was the zenith of compassion any human being could undertake when stakes were high,  there was much to loose and Lincoln stood his ground on abolishing slavery.


With lots of love, hugs and kisses.

Daddy


P.S: I just can't wait to see you love, I miss you so much.

Socks and Shoes

My Dear Rishi,

I have not been able to write this blog consistently for past few months. In the past few weeks since my mom's passing away it has been rather difficult to sit and write.

This morning I came across an interesting story on compassion and thought this would be a good one to share with you.

 

Socks and Shoes

Author Unknown

 

A little boy about 10 years old was standing before a shoe store on the roadway, barefooted, peering through the window, and shivering with cold. A lady approached the boy and said, " My little fellow, why are you looking so earnestly in the that window?" " I was asking God to give me a pair of shoes," was the boy's reply.

 

The lady took him by the hand and went into the store and asked the clerk to get half a dozen pairs of socks for the boy. She then asked if he could give her a basin of water and a towel. He quickly  brought them to her. She took the little fellow to the back part of the store and, removing her gloves, knelt down, washed his little feet, and dried them with a towel. By this time the clerk had returned with the socks, Placing a pair upon the boy's feet, she purchased him a pair of shoes. She tied up the remaining pairs of socks and give them to him. She patted him on the head and said, " No doubt, my little fellow, you feel more comfortable now?'

 

As she turned up to go, the astonished lad caught her by the hand, and looking up in her face, with tears in his eyes, asked the lady: " Are you God's wife?"

 

 

Rishi, this story when I read it I felt the power of compassion being conveyed in a very simple but very effective way. I hope, pray and wish you are a compassionate person.

 

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

 

Daddy

Compassion in Action-A Higher Call

My Dear Rishi,

I recently came across an interesting article about two World War II pilots one an American and another a German. I was so fascinated by the article to read about compassion in action, I ended up buying the book, " A Higher Call" By Adam Makos with Larry Alexander and read it.   Here is my version of the original story for you Rishi.


Charlie Brown & Franz Stigler



This is a true incident which happened on December 20th, 1943, in the midst of World War II. Rishi, this was a time where there was lot of pain, suffering, death and sorrow. A sorrow which day by day grew darker than night and cruelty was its zenith. Amidst all this misery, an act of compassion unfolded over the skies of Northern Germany. An American B-17 bomber, flown by Charlie Brown was on bombing mission was badly damaged when a German fighter pilot Franz Stigler in his Bf-109 intercepted them. It is expected to shoot the enemies plane at the first sight. However, on that day Franz Stigler, when he flew towards the B-17 bomber as he reached close to hundred yards realized all the men in the plane were badly wounded. He flew close to the B-17 looked right into the Charlie Brown and his co-pilot's eyes and saluted them. He escorted the plane safely across Germany so that no ground fire would shoot B17 down. This was a very risky for Franz Stigler, yet he led his humanity, kindness and compassion dictate his actions.

 In 1953, Franz Stigler moved to Vancouver, Canada after the war. In 1985, he was invited to attend 50th Anniversary party for the Boeing B-17 bomber at Paine Field. During the course of party he realized he was the only German pilot. A camera crew who was filming and interviewing veterans for a TV special spoke to Franz. During the interview he mentioned about damaged B-17. He did not remember the date but remembered the plane, the incident and pondered about the crew. He returned to Vancouver. 

Charlie Brown who settled in Miami, Florida was similarly curious to find out about the German pilot who spared his and his crew's life.  He wrote to a German Fighter Pilots association news letter(Jaggerblatt-Fighter Journal) to publish his story describing his story of December 20th, 1943 incident. Initially, his letter was rejected but eventually it was published in January 1990 edition. Franz saw Charlie's letter in the news letter and wrote to Charlie.   Charlie finally spoke to Franz over the phone. Once sworn enemies, who never exchanged words 47 years later were talking to each other because of Franz's act of compassion and kindness. On June 21st, 1990 both men finally met face to face in Seattle with hugs and tears of gratitude and love. Franz told Charlie that his brother had died in 1940 as a night fighter pilot. Franz became a fighter pilot to honor his brother. In addition, Charlie learned Franz had not been out of ammunition to shoot down his plane and also learned Franz was one of the top fighter pilots in Germany during the war.

Franz Stiegler wrote following letter to Charlie brown:

In 1940, I lost my only brother as a night fighter. On the 20th of December, 4 days before Christmas, I had the chance to save a B-17 from her destruction, a plane so badly damaged it was a wonder that she was still flying. The pilot, Charlie Brown, is for me, as precious as my brother was.

Thanks Charlie,

Your Brother,

Franz

 

Franz Stigler passed away in March 2008 and Charlie Brown died in November 2008.

 

Rishi, a single of act of compassion, kindness and courage, amidst destruction, pain, fear and loss transformed many lives. My prayer for you is that let compassion, love, kindness be the core of who you are Rishi.

Remember always, I love you till the moon and back. We both are always in each other's heart no amount of physical distance can separate us...  I love you and miss you very much love.

With lots of Love, Hugs and Kisses

Daddy

P.S:  The following quote is from one of Franz Stigler's officer. This demonstrates compassion in action.

"You follow the rules of war for you, not for your enemy. You fight by rules to keep your humanity....Lt. Gustav Roedel

Suspended Coffees

My Dear Rishi,

It has been rather interesting " monosyllable conversations lately. All I want you to understand son is that "I love you from here to the moon and back". Miss you very much Rishi!

Few days back I came across very interesting situation which demonstrated "Compassion in Action". I could not have written about compassion in action more effectively.

 

Suspended Coffee
 

 



I entered a little coffee shop with a friend of mine and gave our order. While were approaching our table,  two people came in and they went to the counter and ordered: ‘Five coffees. Two for us and three suspended, please! They paid for seven cupos of coffee, took their respective cups of coffee and left.

I asked my friend: “What are those ‘suspended’ coffees?”
My friend said : “Wait, Observe and Learn.”

Some more people entered, The next order was for seven coffees and it was made by two doctors- two for them and five ‘suspended’. While I was still wondering what on earth was a ‘suspended’ coffees as  I was sipping my coffee, enjoying bright  sunny spring morning and the beautiful view towards the square in front of the cafe. Suddenly an old man dressed in shabby clothes who looked like a beggar came in through the door and asked, " Do you have any suspended coffee?’ The lady behind the counter gave the old man a cup of warm coffee and a bagel. The old man thanked the lady behind the counter and left the cafe.

It’s simple - people pay in advance for a coffee meant for someone who can not afford a warm beverage. The tradition of the suspended coffees, as I understand the tradition was born in the cafes of Italy's southern city of Naples,  people pay in advance for one or several coffees without drinking them. The concept of "Suspended Cafes" has spread all over the world and in some places you can order not only a suspended coffee, but also a sandwich or a whole meal.

Rishi, Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have such cafes or even grocery stores in every city, town around the world where the less fortunate will find hope and support? We humans can take care of each other. It is like bringing "Human Values" to the Humanity.  I hope and wish you learn to be more compassionate and loving person.  Holiness the Dalia Lama, says the following about Compassion and Love:

Compassion and love are not mere luxuries. As a source of both inner and outer peace, they are fundamental to the continued survival of our species."

With lots of love, hugs and best wishes,

Daddy

P.S: I love you and miss you Rishi!

Power of Compassion

My Dear Rishi,

It has been sometime since I wrote to you. I have been going through rather, let's say challenging time. During this time I have never missed a moment where I did not think about you or miss you love.

Words are not enough to even begin describing how much I miss you son. All the things what a father and son take it for granted i.e. playing, walking to school, reading bed time stories, watching a ball game or hugging, building a snowman or playing in snow, bonding etc has been taken away from us, love. I miss you and love you very much.  I just try to tell myself, "The will of God will not take us to places, where his grace will not protect us". I have faith in that God...there is a reason for this gulf between us and only time will tell us although it may not give back us what we have lost but it will give us an opportunity to build in future. That is my hope, that is my prayer, in that I have faith my love.

Today's story is about compassion and demonstrates the power of compassion. I read this story when I was about 12 years old. Although, it took next 20 years for me to understand the true meaning of this story. 

During the time of the Buddha, there was a notorious robber by name of Angulimal who had mercilessly taken hundreds of lives. Angulimal (translated finger-garland) wore a garland made out of one finger of each of his victims. He was a terror and everyone in the village dreaded him. One day, as the Buddha was walking with his disciple, he was stopped by Angulimal, who announced that he was going to take Buddha’s life and adorn his finger in his garland as well.

The Buddha calmly responded “Sure you may take my life, but please fulfill my wish before dying”
“What do you want” asked Angulimal.
“Cut off the branch of that tree” said the Buddha.
In just one slash of Angulimal’s sword the branch came down.
“What now” asked Angulimal.
“Put the branch back on!” said the Buddha.
The bandit laughed. "You must be mad to think that anyone can do that."

The Buddha said “You can cut off my head, however can you give me life back? If you cannot give me life, what right do you have to take it? You think you are mighty because you can wound and destroy others? Any child could have broken of the branch of that tree. The mighty people of the world do not destroy . The truly mighty know how to create and heal”.

Angulimal experienced a deep silence within. He threw away his sword and garland, and fell at Buddha’s feet and said “I never thought about it, that any mediocre person can destroy, and only those with mighty hearts create. Please accept me as your disciple”.

The Buddha embraced Angulimal and initiated him. A violent criminal thus began the process of transformation into a gentle sage. No one is an eternal rogue. Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future.

 

 

Hope and wish you bring compassion and love in your life. I miss you Rishi!!

 

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

 

Daddy

 

 

Five Lessons for Life

My Dear Rishi,

Hope we can talk later in the evening. Hope you had a great weekend. I am looking forward to speaking to you today.

Few years back I wrote something and wanted to share with you. I wrote this at one of my lowest points in life.

FIVE LESSONS FOR LIFE

(1 :15am July 19^th , 2009)

1.        Everything changes and ends: If there is a beginning than there will be an end. Change happens continuously between the beginning and end; and this is what we call life.

2.      Things do not go always according to plan: If you believe in god and if you want to make god laugh please do share your plans

3.      Life is always not fair but you treat everyone with compassion, kindness, acceptance, empathy and loving them unconditionally.

4.      Pain is part of life but do not give pain to others, if someone crosses your path even for few seconds ensure that you cover their path with rose petals.

5.      People are not loving and loyal all the time but you always be loving and loyal to them under any circumstances because end of the day you only have control over your actions, your choices. You cannot control other person or choose for them, don’t let other people’s actions determine your actions. In any situation you will always have a choice, a choice to walk the higher road or not. In this lies our freedom, freedom to choose.

Rishi, hope some day you realize the value of this although I must warn you, this path is very tough, very lonely. Rishi, I miss you very much love.

With lots of love, hugs and kisses.

Daddy

Understanding and Compassion in Action

My Dear Rishi,

Let's continue the journey of understanding and compassion. I recently stumbled upon a story of understanding and compassion in action.

In 1976 Special Olympics was held in Sponkane, Washington. During a track and field event one of the nine contestants,  taking part in the race fell down after taking few steps because of his handicap. He tried to get up but he fell again. Two of the contestants saw the fallen contestant and came to his rescue. They  helped him to his feet and together they crossed the line. The audience rose to their feet and gave a standing ovation.

Rishi, here is a beautiful example of understanding and compassion in action. The two contestants chose the spirit of cooperation over competition. When we are aligned to cooperate with understanding our compassion lights our lives. We need more understanding and love to sustain this humanity.  His Holiness the Dalia Lama put this concept of "Compassion in Action" much more eloquently, "It is not enough to be compassionate. You must act. There are two aspects to action. One is to overcame the distortions and afflictions of your own mind, that is, in terms of calming and eventually dispelling anger. This is action out of compassion. The other is more social, more public. When something needs to be done in the world to rectify the wrongs, if one is really concerned with benefiting others, one needs to be engaged, involved"

Rishi, hope and wish you some day be the beacon of compassion in action. I love you very much and miss you.

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy
 

Prayer of Understanding

My Dear Rishi,

I wanted to begin this year focusing on, "Understanding and Compassion". Hope, some day you will learn the true meaning and value of these two very powerful words.  Over the course of this year I will share with you some personal experiences, interesting writings I have read from wiser people who have walked this path quite ahead of me and longer than I have. Let me begin this journey of letters with a prayer, I read few days ago it is called, "Prayer of Understanding" By Abby Willowroot.  I took the liberty of making some minor changes but the essence of the poem is kept same. (I hope author forgives me for taking this liberty).

 

Prayer of Understanding



 By Abby Willowroot
 

May I come to Understand

that blessings are everywhere,

that my attitude will effect outcomes,

that challenges are often gifts in disguise.

 

May I come to Trust

that most things can get better, with time,

that a positive attitude make things go smoother.

 

May I come to See

that our skills and talents can be put to help others

that I am a positive influence on many people

that I am surrounded by people who wish me well.

 

May I come to Value

that today is a blessing to be enjoyed,

that each person is unique & important

that each moment of our lives has a meaning

 

Rishi, understanding intellectually will take you to a certain level but understanding with compassion and your heart will free you from you the trappings of this mind and intellectual crutches. Hope you transcend your mind and learn to lead life from a place of compassionate heart.

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy