Failure is not Final

My Dear Rishi,


It was fun talking to you yesterday. As I mentioned it was Honey's birthday yesterday I have had Honey for 10 years :) and I am so glad she is part of my life. Hope, you were here too...Honey is your mom's birthday gift...


Yesterday after  I spoke to you I was thinking about my grandmother (dad's mother) and remembered  an interesting story she told me when I was about 9 years old after our encounter with an elephant. It was during my summer holidays my brother and I along with my parents were visiting my grand parents. We used to have lots of fun at my grand parents. I still remember eating Gooseberry, Guava etc  One day grandmother, my younger brother and I were walking to the temple There was this huge elephant out side the temple tied to a small peg with a rope. I was totally perplexed and asked my grandma how come such a powerful and strong animal cannot run away by breaking the rope.

My grandmother took me to the Mahout -person who trains and manages the elephant. Mahout was very interesting and funny man. He gave each one of us a banana and asked us to feed the elephant. The elephant's name was Seetha, I think. After eating the banana the elephant blessed us by putting the trunk on our heads. Grandmother asked me to repeat the question I had asked her earlier i.e. how come a strong elephant who is tied to a small peg with a rope cannot break free.

Mahout said, “when the elephants are very young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them and, at that age, it’s enough to hold them. But as they grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free. The elephant never attempt to break the rope and run away."  I was very happy with the answer.


Later that evening my grandmother said something which has been seared into my memory forever.  She asked me if I remembered what the Mahout told us about the elephant. Like you ,I have a good memory, I was able to recollect and repeat what Mahout had told us. Grandma said there is an important lesson to learn from this experience that I should always remember. She said like the elephant you saw in the temple, many humans go through life hanging on to a belief that we cannot do something, because we failed once when we attempted.  Remember, failure is essential part of learning; like an elephant we should never give up because of our struggles in life. Failure is not final.

Rishi, never ever give up in life. If you fail try once again and again till you succeed. My mom used to always tell me failures are the stepping stone for success. If you fail once, get up and try harder till you succeed and trust me you will succeed.

If you feel very down because you have failed...Please look at this video..hope you are inspired as I am always inspired and I don't give up

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxjiEi2Eywk&feature=related


I love you son and miss you.

With lots of love, hugs and best wishes,

Daddy

The Story of a Blind Girl

My Dear Rishi,

I was not able to write to you last week as I was under the weather. I enjoy our conversations  on the weekends, yesterday's conversation was rather brief.

We all go through various trials and tribulations in life. I came across an interesting story and wanted to share with you.


There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she was blind. She hated every one except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. One day she said to her boyfriend if only she could see the world, she would marry him

One day someone donated a pair of eyes. After the surgery and recovery, she was able to see the world including her boyfriend. Her boyfriend was very happy for her and asked her, "now that you can see the world, will you marry me?"

The girl was shocked when she realized her boyfriend was blind and she refused to marry him. Her boyfriend was completely heart broken and with heavy heart he walked away. Later he wrote to her letter with just one line and it said," Just take care of my eyes dear".

This is how human brain changes when the status changed. Only few remember what life was before, and who’s always been there even in the most painful situations.

Life Is A Gift

Today before you think of saying an unkind word–
think of someone who can’t speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food–
think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife–
think of someone who is crying out to God for a companion.

Today before you complain about life–
think of someone who went too early to heaven.

Before you complain about your children–
think of someone who desires children but they’re barren.

Before you argue about your dirty house, someone didn’t clean or sweep–
think of the people who are living in the streets.

Before whining about the distance you drive–
think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.

And when you are tired and complain about your job–
think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job.

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another–
remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down–
put a smile on your face and thank God you’re alive and still around.

Rishi, I know first hand how I was there for someone when this person was going through a very tough family situation and when I was in a very similar situation, this person just walked out of my life and gave me a gift of loneliness. Over the years I have realized instead of being bitter and angry with this person, I am grateful to this person because this person in giving me the pain, sorrow and gift of loneliness helped me to develop inner strength. This inner strength has helped me to be true to myself, reach out to others and help them, and most important lesson I learned is importance of forgivness and how to forgive this person.

Rishi, I have also learned that, "The will of god will not take you where grace of god will not protect you. God will give you enough strength and courage to sustain you. All you need is HOPE and FAITH.

HOPE is : Heart Open for Positive Emotions or Experiences or Encounters

FAITH is: Full Assurance In The Heart.

Rishi, Hope and Faith are akin to two wings of a bird. God has given the humanity two wings namely, HOPE and FAITH to face any storms life has to throw at us so that we can rise and fly higher after every storm. Have you ever wondered, after a major storm or hurricane or typhoon, the birds nests (their homes) are destroyed, all you hear after the storm has passed are birds chirping akin to singing songs and building their nests? Think about it love :)

 I love you Rishi, miss you sweet heart...

With Lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy

The Real Seven Wonders of the World

My Dear Rishi,

Sorry I am bit late writing this letter. It was nice to talk to you on Saturday. I really look forward to our weekly talks it would have been nice if we could meet online video conference.  Even this shall too pass.

I came across a beautiful story and  wanted to share with you.

A group of students were asked to list what they thought were the present Seven Wonders of the  World. Though there was some disagreement, the following got the most votes:

1. Egypt's Great Pyramids
2. Taj Mahal
3. Grand Canyon
4. Panama Canal
5. Empire State Buiding
6. St. Peter's Basilica
7. China's Great Wall.

While gathering the votes, the teacher noted that one quite student hadn't turned in her paper yet. So she asked the girl if she was having trouble with her list. The replied, "Yes, a little. I couldn't quite make up my mind because there are so many". The teacher said, "Well, tell us what you have,  and may be we can help".

The girl hesitated, then read, "I think the Seven Wonders of the World are:

1. to touch
2. to taste
3. to see
4. to hear

She hesitated a little, and then added....

5. to feel
6. to laugh
7. and to love.

The room was so full of silence you could have heard a pin drop. Those things we overlook as simple and "ordinary" are truy wondrous. A gentle reminder that the most precious things in life cannot be bought.

Rishi, your video messages and drawings you gave me in just before Christmas of 2011 are very precious child. Rishi every time I hear, I can't help but feel your love and your presence. In your voice I can sense your love and longing for me too. I will post the video one of these days here.  I will also scan your drawings and post it here. Thank you very much sweet heart...

Here is a picture of us at Expo, Singapore

 

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy.

Life Lessons

My Dear Rishi,

Hope you are doing well and you are back to school.  In the past few days I was reflecting back on my life and I was making a list of things I have learned and continue to learn.   I wanted to take this opportunity to share with you and make you part of this journey. Hope you may find some of the points  useful someday :). 

1. Live in Gratitude: Start the day with gratitude, live in gratitude and end the day with gratitude. You may be pondering why gratitude is essential? When you are in a state of gratitude, you open your world to possibilities. In the world of possibilities, you are in a positive place and being in positive place helps you attract positive influences in terms of people, circumstances and opportunities. When you live in gratitude, you are able to enjoy the life's simplest pleasures and you will discover life's greatest joys.

2. Be Authentic: What does this mean? Being true to yourself is the most important gift you can give yourself. This is the first and the most important commitment you should make in your life. Do not ever betray yourself and try to be true to someone else under any circumstances. Now having said that, being true to yourself, this is also the most difficult task. You will learn people will try to manipulate you or emotionally blackmail you or make you feel guilty or accuse you of being selfish. How do you distinguish when you are being selfish or authentic? When you are authentic or true to yourself, your thoughts, words and actions will be aligned. When your thoughts, words and actions are aligned you will be at peace and feel the joy within you and around you. This is how you can tell if you are being true to yourself. If you cannot be authentic or true to yourself, you will never be or can be true to others.

3. Face and Embrace your Fears: If a ship had the ability to think and feel fear, it would never leave its shores. The only way to deal with fears are to meet them face to face, look into the eye of the fear and embrace them. Once you deal with your fears you will never again lead a limited life, you will not be bound by your fears. Always remember, fear stands for False Evidence Appearing Real.

4. Kindness: Kindness is hallmark, talisman of a strong person, only weak are cruel and wicked. Kindness towards others and as well as to yourself is very important. People who are not kind to themselves can never be kind to others. Be kind in your thought, word and actions. Kindness will sustain you, nourish you and elevate you to higher consciousness. When you operate from a place of kindness, compassion and understanding you are reaching your highest potential as a human being.

5. Love: The purpose of life is love. Love is unconditional. True love seeks nothing in return and only gives.  If someone says if you love me you would listen to me or try to control you or manipulate you or make you feel guilty. My advise is, just move away from such people because all they are trying to do is manipulate or control you. This is not love. True love is free from drama melodrama. Love is beautiful, love is kind and love is truth. When you find such love son, count your blessings and bask in the glory of such love. Believe in such love. Remember to listen to your heart. Your heart is much more wiser than your mind because your mind is like a monkey. As monkey jumps from one branch to another and it is never still, so is your mind.

6. Influences: We all are influenced in life from the minute we are born till we die. In our life it is really important to choose our influences very well especially when you are growing up. Spend time with people, places or things that inspire you, motivate you transform you into a better human being. Spend time with people, places or  things that help you in love, overcoming your fears, be kind and live in gratitude. When you choose your influences wisely son, you will light the fire within you. This light will shine  bright and shed  light in the darkest corners of the world. Let your influences in life light the fire within you my love so that you can spread the message of love, kindness and compassion.

7. One Step at a Time: The journey of thousand miles begins with the first step. Patience is a virtue of wise. Learn to do small things very well because you would  have mastered the art of excellence in doing small things. Remember there is no work that is insignificant.  When you embark on doing big things, you will have the necessary discipline, devotion, patience and your signature of excellence will speak for itself. Your execution of any task or job or work will be a reflection of joy, mastery and excellence. Most important this is your contribution to the world...make it ever lasting.

8. Learning: Learning is something you can continue all your life. Learning from school, friends, family and even strangers are important part of your life's journey. Never be shy nor be too egotistical to say these three important words, "I don't know?" When you admit you don't know you create a possibility or open closed doors of your mind to learn. Mind and parachute work best when they are open. One of my favourite authors, Mark Twain said, " Do not let your schooling interfere with your education" I hope influences in your life stoke the fire of learning within you.

Life is a journey, hope one day you can share stories of your journey with me so that I can learn from you love.

I love you Rishi, I listen to your message everyday ....In my next letter to you I will type the message...let me think about if I should upload the message. Love you, miss you Rishi...

With lots of love, hugs and kisses.

Daddy

Instructions for Life by The Dalai Lama

My Dear Rishi,

Wish you a Happy New Year. I really hope we get to spend more time to talk and spend time together ..hopefully sooner than later :)...That is my hope, this is my wish..  let's see what is in store for 2012 for us. I came across an interesting article attributed to The Dalai Lama. A friend of mine sent it to me earlier this week  and I wanted to share it with you.By the way your mother and went to hear The Dalai Lama when he visited Toronto.

1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
2. When you lose, don't loose the lesson.
3. Follow the three R's:

• Respect for self;
• Respect for others and
• Responsibility for all your actions.

4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
6. Don't let a little dispute injure a great relationship
7. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day.
9. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy a second time.
12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.
14. Share your knowledge. It is a way to achieve immortality.
15. Be gentle with the earth.
16. Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
19. If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.
20. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

Remember the purpose of life is to be happy Rishi. I love you and miss you. I love your messages you recorded for me when I was in Singapore.

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy.

Paid in Full with One Glass of Milk

My Dear Rishi

2011 has been a very interesting year.  I dedicated this year to live in gratitude. By living in gratitude life created lot of possibilities for me. In 1996, I read a book called, "Conversations with God" By Neale Diamond Walsch it was a very interesting book, one of the most powerful line was on correct type of prayer, " The right prayer is prayer of gratitude and not prayer of supplication". I lived this year in gratitude and that has made all the difference in life.

I came across a very interesting story on the value of kindness, compassion and value of doing good deed's for others without any expectations.

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water. She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and then asked, “How much do I owe you?” “You don’t owe me anything,” she replied. “Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness.” He said, “Then I thank you from my heart.”

As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.

Year’s later that young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes. Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room. Dressed in his doctor’s apron he went in to see her. He recognized her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to the case.

After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room. She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She began to read the following words:

“Paid in full with one glass of milk”

Signed, Dr. Howard Kelly

Rishi in life what goes around comes around. In my experience I have found kindness and compassion are essential in one's life . When we limit kindness and compassion to our immediate families and friends we draw the circle of family very small. True compassion transcends family and friends and reaches to all humanity and for all the living things in the Universe. Anger and hatred are the main obstacles to compassion.

Hope you have a compassionate heart...I love you and miss you Rishi.

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy.

P.S: I miss you Rishi.

ABC's of Christmas.

My Dear Rishi,

I enjoyed our time together when I visited you in Singapore. I wish I could have stayed bit longer but than again any time with you I cherish and love. Whenever I visit you, I  keep my focus on the positive and ignore the negative, in that way I make a conscious choice to be in the positive frame of mind and let the negativity not affect me. As the year draws to an end when I reflect, I live my life in gratitude for all that I have.

This morning's news paper (Bangalore Times) there is a very good article titled Lessons of Life, this Christmas By Matuli Madhusmita Swain. I wanted to share this with you in the spirit of sharing. Hope we all learn from this and practice it for rest of our lives.

A for Angel: Be an angle to someone you love or care about. Surprise a friend, share some chocolates with colleagues and make someone feel special.

B for Bonhomie: This Christmas let the spirit of bonhomie rule. Move away from the online life and meet your loved ones in person.

C for Carols: Volunteer for carol singing at the nearest Church. Hum and join in. Prayers is meant to test your faith not your singing prowess. The Almighty already know the gifts he has blessed you with.

D for Decoration: Decorate your home even if it is a rented one, with festoons and colours for Christmas.

E for Enthusiasm: Be enthusiastic without being foolhardy. Lear to take challenges head on. Success will pave way for newer challenges. Begin with enthusiasm.

F for Faith: Let faith be your North Star. Challenge yourself; go beyond your limitations with a leap of faith.

G for the Gratitude: Revel in the generosity of life. Make peace with who you are and be grateful for the life that you have received.

H  for Health: Wake up early and hit the gym, go for a swim, play a sport you like. Gift yourself good health.

I for Inspiration: Get inspired! Choose your own idea and start something new like a Recycle club with the neighbourhood kids.

J of Joy: Cultivate joy all year round. Celebrate small successes, and remember that all good things need times to be done.

K for Karma: Stock up on good karma. Let your speech be more dignified, and make friends with compassion and empathy.

L for Love: Let love be your motto and let go of all the unwanted baggage. Cherish the present moment and welcome the new with a lighter, happier you.

M for Magic and Miracles: Christmas is for miracles and magic. Like the child who trusts life with simple heart, trust your intuition.

N for New: Try something new. Open you mind to experimentation and change. Go beyond the obvious. Remember, an anchored ship never did find new shores.

O for Organising: Organise your life. Clear the clutter. Bless yourself with an uncomplicated life and mind.

P for Prioritise & Perspective: "Prioritize" and put things in "Perspective". Delegate when possible. You will achieve a lot more when you accept what you can do alone and what needs extra helping hands.

Q for Quest: Never stop learning in life. Be passionate and humble to learn from one and all.  Each one has something to teach, only if you are willing to learn.

R for Rest & Rejuvenate: Every once in a while, stop to truly rest. It's important to rejoice in the scenery even as you drive towards your destination.

S for Santa and Sleigh: Ever seen Santa & his sleigh? Be like Santa and make sure your sleigh is always filled with compassion and good will all through the year.

T for Thank You: This Christmas, say "Thank You" to as many people you can. Start with your parents, and extend thanks to all. Life is best lived with experience, thank everyone for bringing different experiences into your life.

U for Understanding: Cultivate the power of understanding. Give yourself sometime before you judge or react. It will save you many regrets later.

V for Vigour: Get back the spring in your step and the twinkle in your eyes. Promise yourself an active day full of energy. Listen to a foot tapping number when you dress up. A difficult day will ease the moment you decide to go through it with your chin up.

W for Wonder: Give yourself full five minutes of wonder and rapture everyday. See the colours of sunrise, marvel at the perfection o a rose, revel in simplicity of a child's laugh...there is plenty to see in the world.

X for Xcitement: Remember when you were a child and each day was a new mystery to be solved. Let excitement be your anthem each day. Take a different route to work, wear a bright colour, and do something unexpected of you!

Y for Yuletide: The spirit of Christmas is to be celebrated all year round. The pie called life tastes best when the sweet is balanced with some tartness and spice.

Z for Zen: Create your own Zen corner. Get a comfy recliner. Show case your self-made art on a corner table. Stock a wall space with your favourite novels.

This Christmas. let a better life unfold for you...There are no dress rehearsals or retakes in life, the " Action" has already been announced, direct your movie before "The End".

Wishing you the very best on Christmas, with lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Love,

Daddy