Invictus

My Dear Rishi,

We had a great chat on the weekend. You read from the book I gave you  "On The Day you were Born" By Nancy Tillman. I am really impressed and proud of you Rishi.  You remembered that I had pasted our pictures together and you could not see them anymore. Rishi, you know what you said to me finally, "Daddy, I love you forever where you are, wherever you go, my love will find you". Thank you Rishi! I love you and miss you!

Today's poem is called Invictus. In Latin, it means invincible, unconquered. William Ernest Henley, author of this poem wrote it when his one remaining foot was to be amputated, he was in lot of pain, the words flowed, "In the fell clutch of circumstances I have not winced nor cried aloud". In a very short life of twenty five years he had endured illness, poverty, pain and suffering...endless treatments and operations testing human courage to its limits. As he lay in his hospital bed, he promised himself, smiling and said, "But I won't give up! I won't give, no matter what happens. I thank god for unconquerable soul". I find this poem very appropriate for the emotional pain of missing you, not playing with you, not being part of your life as you grow.....Rishi, I won't give up on you, on us, our love, love between a father and child....I won't...I love you son.  I read this poem every day, sometimes every waking hour.....I find strength and courage to face another second.. Interestingly, enough Nelson Mandela, used to read the same poem, during apartheid regime in South Africa when he was imprisoned in Robben Island, isolated from his family, alone, in a dark and dingy cell.

Invictus

William Ernest Henley

 

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

 

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed

 

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the Horror of the shad,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds and shall find me unafraid.

 

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul

 

This poem has helped me and given me courage to face sorrow, pain and fear; and accept the blows of my fate, to triumph and raise like a Phoenix.  Yes, one thing  I have to admit though, I do weep when the pain of not being with you becomes too great to bare, which is at least once a day.





 

 



 

I love you Rishi and miss you!

 

 

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

 

Daddy

A Psalm of Life

My Dear Rishi,

I enjoyed our conversatin on 13th morning for about 40 minutes.  You were full of life, we talked about your school, your freinds and the best part was you were imitating different animals especially the Asiatic Gibbon, you remembered from the time we visited in Singapore Zoo

 

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, is one of my favourite poets. His poetry and his writing has influenced my life. One of his poems I love reading  is called, "A Psalm of Life". This poem became so famous it was translated into French, German, Italian, Portuguese, Dutch, Swedish, Danish and Sanskrit. I personally like this poem as its message is full of  faith and hope. This poem has helped me alot in the past five years. Hope, you also find this poem insprirational as many in this world.

 

 

A Psalm of Life

By Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

 

Tell me not, in mournful numbers,

Life is but an empty dream!-

For the soul is dead slumbers,

And things are not what they seem.

 

Life is real! Life is earnest!

And the grave is not its goal;

Dust thou art, to dust returnest,

Was not spoken of the soul.

 

Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,

Is our destined end or way;

But to act, that each tomorrow

Find us farther than today.

 

Art is long, Time is fleeting,

And our hearts, though stout and brave,

Still, like muffled drums, are beating

Funeral marches to the grave.

 

In the world's broad field of battle,

In the bivouac of Life,

Be not like dumb, driven cattle!

Be a hero in the strife!

 

Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant!

Let the dead Past bury its dead!

Act, _act in the living Present!

Heart within, and God o'erhead!

 

Lives of great men all remind us

We can make our lives sublime,

And, departing, leave behind us

Footprints on the sands of time,

 

Footprints, that perhaps another,

Sailing o'er life's solemn main,

A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,

Seeing, shall take heart again.

 

Let us, then, be up and doing,

With a heart for any fate;

Still achieving, still pursuing,

Learn to labor and to wait.

 

Rishi, this poem was quoted by Gandhi and one of his favourite line is (..."Things are not what they seem"). Hope poems like this guide you in your life.

 

 



 

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

 

Love,

 

Daddy

 







Thanksgiving-Those

My Dear Rishi,

I enjoyed talking to you for about forty minutes on the weekend. You were laughing and making funny noises. Every time I hear your voice, your laughter it sustains me till the next time I get to talk to you.

 

Honey

 



Yesterday was thanksgiving in Canada. Honey and I spent time together. Once again I missed you, love! This thanksgiving, despite my personal loss. I have chosen to be thankful to what "is" in my life. Although you are so far away and I miss you very much, I am thankful for the fact that you are well taken care of, you are loved and you have family around you. Rishi, as a parent it is natural to expect to be with their children and be part of their growing up experience. However, it is much more important for a parent in my situation is to be is thankful that their children or child is loved, cared for and are safe. As a father, I need to go beyond my own emotional need and look at life from your need and your perspective as you are the future and I am the past. I am grateful and thankful that every time we talk you tell me I love you daddy...Thank you Rishi :)

 



Honey

Today's poem is from a book called Live Your Dash By Linda Ellis. The title of poem is "THOSE"

 

Those

By Linda Ellis

 

I write, not for those thankful

for an abundance of wealth,

for whom good fortune has blessed

their home and their health;

 

those who walk golden pathways

towards means and success...

a safe distance apart

from those who have less,

 

but instead for the people

who can see those with more

and still humbly count blessings

for which they are thankful for;

 

those whose journey through life

has been far from the best,

yet consider themselves

nonetheless, blessed;

 

those whose open hearts give

without asking why;

those who freely share water

when their own well is dry;

 

those who view neighbors' riches

with no envy or greed,

nor resent them for having

much more than they need.

 

Let us solemnly promise

a day shall not close

without being grateful

and thankful for Those....

 

Rishi, my personal view on gratitude and being thankful begins from the minute I open my eyes. If I can get up from my bed in the morning, I am grateful and thankful to the universe that I have a roof above my head and a bed to sleep. I am grateful and thankful for Honey's presence in my life. I am thankful and grateful for the fact that I am able to walk, talk and do my things. I am thankful and grateful for the fact that I have  love, good health, enough money to sustain myself and do things I like and more. I can go on and on about things I am thankful and grateful for. Rishi, I choose to live a life of GRATITUDE. In, "Conversations with God" author Neale Donald Walsch wrties, "The correct prayer is not prayer of supplication but prayer of GRATITUDE...". I hope, pray and wish you live a life of GRATITUDE and not a life of supplication.

 

I love you Rishi!!

 

With lots of love, hugs and kisses

 

Love,

Daddy