The Stone Soup

My Dear Rishi,

I called you for past two weekends many times, somebody picked up the phone and  hung up. Rishi, I have missed talking to you love...Love you ..miss you.

Guess what I did this weekend i.e. September 24th?? I went for skydiving. I did my first jump off a perfectly normal plane alone with a parachute at 3700 feet above ground.This is called Solo jump. It was amazing, exhilarating experience love. I hoping to do few more jumps in coming weeks. This is another thing I have crossed off my bucketlist, Rishi.

Today's story is about The Stone Soup. The first time I heard this story was from my grandmother when I was about 11 years or so.

There was a famine  in a village due to prolonged drought due to lack of rains for few years.  The farmers could not grow anything. One day a traveller was passing through the village. He was very hungry and tired, he decided to spend the night in the village. The villagers discouraged him to stay in the village by saying there was no food.

The traveler thought for a moment and informed the villagers he did not want any food and in fact, he was planning to make some soup and share with all the villagers. The villagers were bit skeptical about his claim. The traveller took out a big pot from his carriage. He got some water and washed the pot. Then he built a small fire and placed the big pot filled with water on fire with help of few villagers.  Then he took a silk pouch and asked the village chief to take out the stone from the pouch and drop it in the pot. After boiling the water with the stone, traveller took a long sniff and claimed the taste of the stone soup was amazing.  The villagers became very curious and interested in the soup the traveller was making. Traveller took this opportunity, to mention how amazing this soup would taste if he had a cabbage.  One of the villagers went back to his  home and brought few cabbages and gave it to the traveller on a condition, that he would share the soup with his family. Traveller assured him and took the cabbages washed them and put it in the stone soup. Soon other villagers went to their respective houses and find carrots, beets, onions. chicken etc. By the time the soup was ready, all the villagers had contributed to making of the soup by sharing whatever they had and everyone in the village was able to enjoy the stone soup. 

This story very clearly articulates the human tendency of hoarding in times of scarcity. This man induced deprivation is cause of human misery . Food is just one metaphor.  When we get emotionally hurt, we isolate ourselves and shut out others out. We hord ideas, love, money and think we will be rich.  We withhold love, trust and kindness too.  When we do this, we truly become poor because our greed takes over. By sharing, by loving, trusting we become rich. 

Rishi, I have always believed the reason why we are born as humans is because of only one quality and that is caring for another human as well as all the living things around us. Caring is sharing. Look at the spirit of the villagers, when they started sharing what each one had, they were able to feed an entire village. There is abundance in sharing and caring. There is nothing but poverty in hoarding, grabbing everything and living a self-centered and selfish life. This hoarding mentality or holding mentality or not sharing will always cause pain and misery to others as well as to our own selves. We as humanity can overcome any difficulty if we are together and always remember, "Caring is Sharing".

I love you and miss you Rishi..

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy

Our Bank Account

My Dear Rishi,

Hope you had a great week. It has been a busy but good week. I am really looking forward to talking to you in another ten minutes. I miss you love.

I came across an interesting story and I wanted to share with you. The story is called, "Our Bank Account".

A 92-year-old, legally blind  well dressed with his hair fashionably combed and shaved, gentlemen, moved to a nursing home. His wife of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, he smiled sweetly when told his room was ready.

He maneuvered his walker to the elevator, a caretaker provided a visual description of his tiny room,  including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on his window.

'I love it,' he stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.

'Mr. Jones, you haven't seen the room; just wait....

'That doesn't have anything to do with it,' he replied.

'Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn't depend on how the furniture is arranged. It's how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. 'It's a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do.

Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open, I'll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I'v e stored away. Just for this time in my life Old age is like a bank account. You withdraw from what you've put in.

So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories! Thank you for your part in filling my Memory bank.

I am still depositing.' Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.

Rishi, these five things in my opinion are the essence of life. Remember this, no one can make you happy or miserable, unless you give other person the power over you. The purpose of life is to be happy and that happiness is within you.

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy

For the Greater Good: Love and Forgiveness

My Dear Rishi,

I enjoyed talking to you yesterday evening. You were so funny and hilarious. You asked me to call you again tomorrow evening and I cannot wait to talk to you.

Recently, I read very interesting true story about this lady whose son was killed by a 14 year old boy for no reason.  The boy was sentenced by the judge and as he was being lead away by the police, the mother of the boy who was killed shouted at the boy, " I am going to kill you".

After being in prison for a year or so, the boy is visited by the mother whose son was killed. The boy in prison was bit scared to meet  but he agreed to meet her.  They both had a brief conversation. Just before leaving the prison she gave the boy some money and  asked him if he needed anything. After the first visit, she started coming regularly and talking to him.

When he was about to be released from the prison as he turned 18, she asked him what he was going to do? His response was , "I don't know, I have no idea. I got no family, no nothing". She spoke to her friend and arranged for a job in a factory. Than she told the boy  to come and stay with her in her spare room. After about six months later she said to him, "I need to talk to you". They sat in the living room and talked. She said to him, "Remember that day in the court when you were convicted for murdering my son for no reason at all, to get into your gang, and I stood up and said, "I am going to kill you?"

The boy said "Yes ma'am, I'll never forget that day".

She replied, "Well I have. You see, I didn't want a boy who could kill in cold blood like that to continue to exist in this world. So I set about visiting you, bringing you presents, bringing you things, and taking care of you. And now I let you come into my house and got you a job and a place to live because I don't have anybody anymore. My son is gone he was the only person that I was living with. I set about changing you, you are the same person anymore.

But I don't have anybody, and I want to know if you'd stay here. I am in need of a son, and I want to know if I can adopt you"

And he said yes and she did.

Rishi, my friend read this blog and sent me this link. Please listen to this  http://storycorps.org/listen/stories/mary-johnson-and-oshea-israel/

Rishi, the mother loved her son so much she chose to forgive so that she can have a son. That is the power of love and forgiveness. Forgiveness is letting go of all the suffering, pain and sorrows, you don't need to carry this burden for life. The Bhagvad Gita says, "If you want to see the brave, look at those who can return love for hatred. If you want to see heroic, look to those who can forgive".  Rishi, forgiveness and love is not for the weak. Cruelty, bitterness and anger are only for people who are weak.   Elie Wiesel (an amazing author hope, you get a chance to read his books some day) says, "Suffering, confers neither privileges nor rights.  It all depends on how you use it. If you use it to increase the anguish of yourself or others, you are degrading, even betraying it. Yet the day will come when we shall understand that suffering can also elevate human beings. God help us to bear our suffering well". 

Immaculee Ilibazia, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, Desmond Tutu and many more have demonstrated through their lives that for the greater good, it is better to forgive and love. Let go of the past pain, sorrows and humiliation etc.. Hope, someday you get to read about these wonderful souls.

Always remember two wrongs will not make things right. Just because someone has hurt you or betrayed you or humiliated you, never repay them in same token but change that to love and forgiveness, dont' give away to hatredness. There is no future without love and forgiveness, only love and forgiveness will sustain you when everything fails.

I love you Rishi. God bless you to be strong, compassionate and loving human being.

Love,

Daddy.

On the Importance of Good Habits

August 27, 2011

My Dear Rishi,

I could not speak to you as your grandmother was rushing out to vote...Hopefully I can speak to you tomorrow morning.

Recently, I came across an interesting quote by Benjamin Franklin on, "Good Habits".

  "Your net worth to the world is usually determined by what remains after your bad habits are subtracted from your good ones."

As I was pondering on this quote I remembered something my grandfather taught my brother and I on the importance of good habits in a very interesting but practical way.

My grandfather's backyard was filled with various fruit trees, vegetable plants and flowering plants. As an agriculture officer, he had an amazing  garden from terms of diversity as well as design. During our summer holidays, we used to spend our time with him. Our arrival was very eagerly anticipated by our grandparents especially by our grandmother. She would make all kinds of sweets for us.

It was during one such holidays in 1978, both  my younger brother and I were playing in his backyard while grandfather was removing some weeds. He called both of us, asked us to help him with pulling out few weeds. As we were happily removing the weeds, he suddenly stopped me and asked me to pull a small plant with deep roots. I struggled but I was able to uproot them. Then he pointed me to pull out a fully grown Papaya tree. I started laughing and said to grandfather there is no way I could uproot the tree with my bare hands.

He smiled and asked my brother and I to sit down and said something like this...(I don't remember every word but I got the essence of what he said), " Our habits are like this if at a very young age we form good habits, they become like a big trees roots go deep and get established and thus, become the foundation of our character and our destiny. Good habits will guide us and shape us for life.  However, if you let bad habits establish like a tree than it will ruin you. It is really important for the health of the garden and also the garden of your life do not let bad habits take root or establish. Identify the bad/negative habits early in your life and remove them before they become established.  Nurture the good, the positive and always cultivate good habits in garden of your life. Be the constant gardener and always be vigilant against the bad/negative things in your life. You may not be able to avoid them sometimes but recognize them and do not let them establish in your life. Don't become slave of your bad habits. Be the master of your life's garden".

Love you Rishi. I look forward to speaking to you tomorrow.

With Lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy

Living in the Present

August 19th, 2011

My Dear Rishi,

I have been trying to reach you and no one is answering the phone :( .

This month has been very interesting and amazing. Sometimes we carry on with our lives and suddenly a door opens and there you are suddenly confronted with your past. This has happened to me on couple of other occasions. I have always pondered about what does it mean and why? For the first time in my life, I learned its true meaning yesterday. Sometimes your past is presented by life in your present to see how you deal with it, have you learnt anything from your past. I have learned that you need to accept and acknowledge your past without running away from it.  From this vantage point, once you accept your past and than you need to accept  and embrace the present i.e. what is in front of you today. Just fall in love with "What Is?". When you argue with your present by living in the past than there is confusion, anger, frustration, pain and suffering. Pain is a choice, suffering is optional. Let go of your past, live in the present. The past will not serve your present.

Today's story is about, "Living in the Present".

Two friends were traveling by train. One was very nervous, restless and full of complaints the whole trip. He was impatient to reach his destination, and disliked every moment of the trip because he had a bad experience in the past. He did not pay attention to his surroundings, as his mind was full of impatient, restless, angry, his past and grumpy thoughts.

His friend, who also had bad experience in the past while travelling,  this time however, enjoyed the scenery, drank a cup of coffee, ate a piece of cake and chatted with the other passengers. He enjoyed every moment of the trip. He lived in the present moment and made the most of it. On arrival he was fresh and felt good. His friend, as expected, arrived exhausted, tired and unhappy.

It is a matter of the right attitude. Life becomes a happy and enjoyable trip when the attitude toward it and its events is positive, and the present moment is used in the best possible way. 

Rishi, please remember the following three points for your life:

1. Remember, the present moment is very brief. It always turns immediately into the past. The future has not happened. Live in the present!

2. Past is a History, Future is a Mystery, Today is all you have, hence it is called "THE PRESENT". So enjoy your present, love.

3. Refuse to relive the past. Change the tape in your mind!
    Enjoy the present moment!
    Find the positive, good and useful in each moment!

I miss you Rishi and I love you very very much

With Lots of Love, Hugs and Kisses,

Daddy.

Love in Action

13 August, 2011

My Dear Rishi,

It was fun talking to you today for about 25 minutes. You were telling me about your birthday and you also said, " I love you daddy and  I miss you". Rishi I miss you and love you. There are times I just want to fly to Singapore and live close to you or you can live with me so that we are closer to each other.. On Aug 8th, I did CN tower edgewalk. CN tower is the tallest free standing structure in Canada, at any given time 6 people go up to 356 meters up in an elevator, walk out and walk around 150 meters of circumference of the tower on a 1.5 meter grilled platform.  It was awesome...here are couple of pictures for you.

Today's story is a true story from Mother Teresa. Rishi, Mother Teresa was an amazing lady, I hope someday you get to read about her. At this point all I can say is her life is the message for humanity.

Love in Action

-By Mother Teresa

One night a man came to our house and told me, “There is a family with eight children. They have not eaten for days,” I took some food and I went. When I finally came to the family, I saw the faces of those little children disfigured by hunger. There was no sorrow or sadness in their faces, just the deep pain of hunger. I gave the rice to the mother. She divided it in two, and went out, carrying half the rice with her. When she came back, I asked her, “Where did you go?” She gave me this simple answer, “To my neighbors-they are hungry also.” I was not surprised that she gave–because poor people are generous. But I was surprised that she knew they were hungry. As a rule, when we are suffering, we are so focused on ourselves we have no time for others.

Rishi, when we focus too much on ourselves especially when we are suffering or sad or heartbroken,  we start wallowing in our misery and suffering. At times like this one needs to reach out and help others. Just like the lady in this story did.

Your mother had given me a small gift to me in 2001 for my birthday. It is a chapter from Bible it reads something like this  " Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. LOVE NEVER FAILS.... Rishi, I have lived and will continue to live rest of my life according to these words.   Love is not just a word, it is a Verb- Love is Action.

Love you Rishi and miss you,

Daddy

A Box of Kisses

Aug. 07th, 2011

My Dear Rishi,

This week you will turn five, once again I will not be there for your birthday. You are growing up so fast and I miss watching you grow up. There are times I just want to drop everything in this world and be  with you.  Rishi have a wonderful birthday and  hope you get to keep the gifts I sent to you. God bless you Rishi, as a father my wish for you is to be always happy and remember. Even though I am so far from  you I love you and miss you. You are always in my thoughts and prayers.  Today's story is called A Box of Kisses.

A Box of Kisses



A man punished his 3-year-old daughter for wasting a roll of gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and he became infuriated when the child tried to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree.
Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift to her father the next morning and said, “This is for you, Daddy.” He was embarrassed by his earlier overreaction, but his anger flared again when he found the box was empty.
He yelled at her, “Don’t you know that when you give someone a present, there’s supposed to be something inside it?”
The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said,”Oh, Daddy, it is not empty. I blew kisses into the box. All for you, Daddy.”
The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little girl, and he begged for her forgiveness.
The man kept that gold box by his bed for years and whenever he was discouraged, he would take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.

In a very real sense, each of us as humans have been given a gold container filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children, friends, family and God. There is no more precious possession anyone could hold.

Rishi, I miss you and love you very much sweetheart...God bless you!

With lots of love, hugs and kisses,

Daddy.

P.S: Have a fantastic birthday :)